Henchman Seems Like a Bad Career
In all of the James Bond films there are always dozens, even hundreds of henchmen. They basically stand around waiting for their chance to die needlessly. They are part of an overwhelming force that gets defeated by one man or woman. They are basically nameless and expendable.
I just watched the beginning of Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (spoiler alert: the movie ends with a lead-in for another sequel). The heroine is walking through a wasteland and suddenly a gang of henchmen pop out of crates and barrels and from under rubble where they may have been hiding for days and attack. They all die pretty quickly and I got the feeling that their whole purpose was to slow Alice down a little bit. Certainly the super bad guy didn't expect or even want the protagonist killed by a bunch of faux ninjas wearing motorcycle helmits. Otherwise he wouldn't get to gloat and make the little speech that ultimately ends up being his undoing.
Henchmen are pretty common in movies and I have to wonder what motivates them. I mean, what kind of job is that? You notice I say "henchMAN." That's because women, forgive me for stereotyping, are simply too smart to take a job like that. Second in command, maybe, but not henchwoman. I admit there are some old tongue-in-cheek spy movies with henchwomen, but they don't die needlessly. In fact, henchwomen tend to be pretty effective at capturing protagonists.
But why do they do it? For a paycheck? "Your job is to die quickly, but the pay is good and we offer a dental plan." I mean really.
Did they answer an ad: "Work in the cone of a dormant volcano; play a minor role in taking over the world; experience with nuclear annihilation a plus?"
On television crime shows, the henchmen have the promise of a cut of the money from a bank job or a kidnapping. Or they were somehow brainwashed by the evil serial killer. But at least they have some ultimate reward, a carrot on a stick, so to speak.
I think about the possible scenarios. Henchman #1 took the job because his mother needs an operation. Henchman #2 has kids in private school. Henchman #3 wants to pay his mortgage off early. And Henchman #4 has an associates degree in "blindly following."
Heck, I don't know. I've never been a henchman, personally. I've spent most of my life being a sidekick, which is a whole different career. I've also been an accomplice a time or two, unwittingly. But the whole henchman thing doesn't seem to have much of a future.
These guys really need to join a union.
Stephen P.
I just watched the beginning of Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (spoiler alert: the movie ends with a lead-in for another sequel). The heroine is walking through a wasteland and suddenly a gang of henchmen pop out of crates and barrels and from under rubble where they may have been hiding for days and attack. They all die pretty quickly and I got the feeling that their whole purpose was to slow Alice down a little bit. Certainly the super bad guy didn't expect or even want the protagonist killed by a bunch of faux ninjas wearing motorcycle helmits. Otherwise he wouldn't get to gloat and make the little speech that ultimately ends up being his undoing.
Henchmen are pretty common in movies and I have to wonder what motivates them. I mean, what kind of job is that? You notice I say "henchMAN." That's because women, forgive me for stereotyping, are simply too smart to take a job like that. Second in command, maybe, but not henchwoman. I admit there are some old tongue-in-cheek spy movies with henchwomen, but they don't die needlessly. In fact, henchwomen tend to be pretty effective at capturing protagonists.
But why do they do it? For a paycheck? "Your job is to die quickly, but the pay is good and we offer a dental plan." I mean really.
Did they answer an ad: "Work in the cone of a dormant volcano; play a minor role in taking over the world; experience with nuclear annihilation a plus?"
On television crime shows, the henchmen have the promise of a cut of the money from a bank job or a kidnapping. Or they were somehow brainwashed by the evil serial killer. But at least they have some ultimate reward, a carrot on a stick, so to speak.
I think about the possible scenarios. Henchman #1 took the job because his mother needs an operation. Henchman #2 has kids in private school. Henchman #3 wants to pay his mortgage off early. And Henchman #4 has an associates degree in "blindly following."
Heck, I don't know. I've never been a henchman, personally. I've spent most of my life being a sidekick, which is a whole different career. I've also been an accomplice a time or two, unwittingly. But the whole henchman thing doesn't seem to have much of a future.
These guys really need to join a union.
Stephen P.
Comments
Post a Comment